See you when we get there.

Love you.

One.

🎂

4-23-13

I felt you on Saturday.

Maybe it was because I was stuck from the “special” brownie your friend passed me on the low as soon as I walked in, but I felt you. I felt God, and it was a feeling I haven’t felt since my adolescent days in the church.

Your friends are now mine. We ate, drank and played beer pong as we would if you were here. They’re all good people. One in particular, obviously on cloud 9, started elaborating on the “connections”; how everyone connected to be at that place and at that time. I felt him, couldn’t keep up but I felt him.

Inside, the women were reminiscing about how much of a douchebag you were. And I started thinking. I never knew if you really really liked me. But then I thought, if you didn’t, I definitely would’ve known, because you were a douchebag, lol.

One of Common’s albums was “One Day It Will All Make Sense”. I felt like it did that day. Life just made sense. Your death just made sense. I felt like everyone that I knew there had some issue that was stressing them, everyone had something that they were going through. The thought of you made everyone forget about it. Everything was good. It’s all good. That makes sense.

Then I walked inside.

I swear was a part of the realest conversation that I ever heard. Just about life and how people deal with the things that happen to them. And crying, and just handling life. Listening, really listening, to elders who have been down the road you’re going is a really insightful experience. And I cried because I felt your presence in the midst of that conversation. It was such a good feeling.

Your pop opened up to me and I stepped up and did something that as a man he’ll never forget. 4/20, 3 days before your birth. 3 weeks before the big day. 4 months since your passing. Everything just connected.

Maybe I was just high. Maybe you’re already reincarnated. Maybe you’ve reached enlightenment. Maybe. But I felt something, and it felt good. And I feel like that was you.

happy b-day